Walking on an Arc

I am an artist by heart. It explains why I am drawn to color. Even my Excel file columns are marked by separate colors. My homework in grad school used to sometimes get submitted in colorful ink. In Arizona, once I first began making an actual living, unbeknownst to the symbolism at the time, I bought a wind-chime styled decorative hanging piece made of multiple colored ribbons. I liked it so much, I hung it outside my apartment, making it visible to neighbors, the street, anyone outside. Next thing I knew, there was ongoing confusion for a day. I was simply coming out with my love for color, not my sexuality.

However, in the past few years I have found glimpses of how being a gay or a lesbian is a full time stressful job. It is covertly used as an insult. When my sexual deviance of not having any partner is treated with the response often received by gay or lesbian individuals, since there is no category for virgin-hate, I get to see how such a life is far from colorful at times. Essentially it is a constant objection thrown by others on who you are as a human being. My best guess is how crossing a well-survived teenage might be a milestone in such lives after which most of life becomes manageable. Unfortunately, people forget, no one chooses a difficult life.